Doing inner work is hard.
Especially with parts of us burdened with intense, negative emotions.
I learned about a framework for working with these parts. It's called RAIN. (Shoutout @know for sharing this with me)
R: Recognize
A: Accept without an agenda
I: Compassionately investigate
N: Nurture
Whenever a part arises:
We recognize what type of part it is
We accept it
We become curious about it
And then we do whatever we need to do to nurture this part back into health
The other day I ordered a small pizza for lunch.
Afterwards, I went for a walk and felt a craving to eat the leftovers.
I stopped, recognized that this was a part, allowed it to exist, and started to investigate.
I asked it where it was coming from and it told me that wasting food wasn't good.
I asked that part where it learned that, and the part zips me over to a younger version of myself.
Shamed by my parents for not finishing my lentil soup.
I look at that young boy, crying on the dining table, and I bring myself into that image with him.
I pull up a chair, put my hand on his head, and tell him that it will be alright and that he isn't alone.
I eat with him, and we finish. I tell him that I am there for him and that he doesn't need to worry again.
I tell him that if food goes to waste in the future, I will deal with it. He doesn't need to.
A shift occurs.
That craving turns into an intention to go home and throw the pizza out. And that is exactly what happens.
I throw it out.
Feeling no desire to eat it, when a few moments ago, it was all I wanted.