Relaxation

What if it was easy to operate life from a state of relaxed ease?

I believe tension from stress doesn't get tasks done more easily.  It's a bad deal because stress and tension:

a) Makes you miserable
b) Fatigues you quickly
c) Constrains your attention

Relaxation works better because you can access more internal resources to solve problems and move forward. It doesn't tire you out. And it's far more enjoyable.

How do you encourage relaxation?

1. Regular, cyclic, deep breathing (no pauses between inhales <> exhales <> inhales)

2. Muscle relaxation (use your awareness to relax muscles, imagine them melting)

3. Taking walking breaks that are nourishing

4. Not sitting for longer than 15 minutes

5. Writing out the resolution to problems and tasks so that the brain doesn't need to work on it

6. Doing a short yoga nidra every 3-5 hours

7. Going into Hakalau (utilizing your peripheral vision)

What if it was possible to be relaxed most of the day? The prevailing belief is that going into a stress-like state is better for getting things done than a relaxed state. It's very black and white. Relaxed means you don't get anything done. Stressed is when you do. But this doesn't seem right. Why would we be subjected to this duality? The truth is that we aren't.

Here are some beliefs powering reliance on stress:

1. Nothing will get done if I am not stressed

2. Stress is the path to success

3. Relaxation isn't effective

4. Relaxation means I can't focus

5. I can't have both

If you go through each and contemplate whether they are true, you may be surprised to see that many of them are BS.

You can relax and do things. It supercharges your performance. Don't believe me? Try it out.

What's interesting and dangerous about a "feed" is that it is a powerful avoidance mechanism that keeps people in avoidance.

For example, you notice a painful emotion in your body, so you do what you always have done: reflexively reach for your phone and begin scrolling.

When you scroll, attention is removed from your body and invested in the feed or whatever content you consume.

This offers "relief" from the emotional pain in your body, yet it doesn't do anything about it; it just postpones the emotional integration.

So, the emotion is still there. But when you start scrolling, you'll encounter different micro-triggers on the feed, which create more small reactions you want to avoid feeling, so you scroll even more.

Which leads me to the conclusion that:

Avoidance is the engine that powers excessive scrolling behaviour. And the business models of the largest social companies.

The solution?

Stop avoiding your emotions. Before scrolling, ask yourself, "What emotion am I avoiding right now?" and take a few breaths to welcome it. Often, you'll notice the desire and need to scroll go away. 

Scroll because you want to, not because you need to.

There are too many tools to choose from -- hopefully this will be the last one I need to pick. 

Attention is our greatest, most valuable asset. And it's something that we can't help but spend. All we can do is choose where to put it.

Reduce the things tugging on your attention, save it for the important things, like family, love, friends, and life.